Monday, July 10, 2006

Mai Non!

I guess now that the World Cup is over I can finally comment on it. I tried to watch the final. Some of it anyway. I just can't force myself to watch an entire game without flipping the channel. Yesterday I watched it until the NASCAR race came on. It was 1-1 when I turned it. I would come back 20 minutes later...still 1-1. Whew...didn't miss anything I guess. Later I came back it was 1-1 in the first overtime. Then 1-1 in the second overtime. I'm sensing a pattern here.

About the only thing interesting was when the French guy head-butted the Italian guy. This morning the talk shows were a buzz with the fake outrage only they can muster up. Here in America we are shocked when violence breaks out at a sporting event...unless you're talking about hockey of course. But in the rest of the world violence is part of the games. I mean, these people kill each other over soccer. Remember the guy from south America that scored in his own goal in the Olympics a few years ago? They killed him...over a soccer game.

And what is with all these soccer players faking their injuries? Yesterday I watched a guy go down and hold his ankle as play continued. Judging by his reaction it looked like a career ending injury. They finally stopped the game and the medical trainers came out. They put the guy on a stretcher and carried him off the field and play continued. After it became apparent they were not going to call a foul, he miraculously got up and ran back into the game. Give me a break. Part of the problem why soccer does not catch on in the United States is that the players are perceived to be pretty boys. All this flopping around and faking injury doesn't help.

So the game finally ended in a 5-3 shootout. This is the dumbest way to crown a world champion I have ever seen. Given the fact the World Cup only comes around every four years makes it even more retarded. The goalie stands in front of a huge net he cannot possibly defend. He is forced to guess which way the shooter is going to go. Many times he falls down before the shooter even kicks the ball. None of the shots were blocked yesterday. France lost when one of their guys missed the net hitting the crossbar.

I cannot stress how dumb this is. Let them play until they drop dead or someone scores. This is like the world series being decided by a game of dodge ball after both teams run out of pitchers in Game 7. It's like deciding the NBA championship with a free throw contest. Or deciding the Superbowl on a coin flip. It's crazy. Don't waste three hours of my life to watch something so stupid. I will never understand soccer or why the world loves it so much.


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